Part 10: It's a Curse, I Tell You.

Zoo time? Zoo time.



ZOO TIME?



Let's split up, gang! Everyone agrees to meet up later outside the lions, and in typical MMBN fashion this means checking everything out first.

It's what the game's training you to do. Check everything, loot everything, make friends with EVERYTHING!



But first things first. The ticket machine will not go unplundered!





This bit speaks for itself, really. There's a RegUp1 here too, but this exchange is honestly more worthwhile.

Exchanges with Mr Progs are generally worthwhile.



Mr Prog you need a better workplace agreement!



Right, that's been established alrea-



-...dy...



um.



Delaying the trip even more, I grab the Snake D chip from inside Tamako's computer's PMD. Given that this game has 200 standard chips, the highest in the series, and many of them can be quite tricky to find, it helps to be meticulous here.

You definitely want to be collecting chips the best that you can as you go through the game. Of course it'll help with your folder some, but more importantly it'll mean less grinding much, much later on...



That said, I did doof around the 3x3 square around Tamako's route into Yoka (you can't explore further, lacking her passcode) to run into a Slimey virus or two to nab me a MetaGel 1 chip early. These are pretty darn nice chips. They're basically AreaGrabs that do more damage if an enemy happens to be in the way instead of just an incidental 10.

I didn't bother to screenshot the viruses themselves, since the chip picture is basically a hires image of one.

Slimey: Yes, you fight Slimers later as their upgraded versions. I'm not joking. Make all the Ghostbusters jokes you want. Anyway, they hop from panel to panel slowly but surely. Then they start stealing your panels to pursue you, hopping after you. The back row can't be stolen, but expect to have your fighting space cut down if you don't delete these quickly.



MissEchelon's Analysis: CUTIE PATOOTIES. But also I don't remember these guys much from this game, so they can't be that bad.



Finally getting on track, pressing L during this sequence will have MegaMan remind you to check out every last animal in the zoo. There's only 2 screens to putter around in, but this is still a bit of a chore.

Mega's just so excited about seeing all the animals.



I found this dig at artists rather amusing, given I'm heading to one of Chicago's art colleges myself. (No, I don't have an artistic bone in my body, we all know THAT already. I'm going into Interactive Arts and Media.)

I think it means "zoo" though. It's written right there.



I'll spare you all the screenshots I took of each animal individually having a "They're glaring ahead" or "They look incredibly angry" line variation. But you'll be quick to notice that the animals all look very hostile.

Maybe Chisao visited them before Lan. That would explain it.



The game's second super-hidden Jack-In location is hidden here, a broken speaker that's flat-out not visible to the player under this roof. You'd only find it by either checking with A or mashing R in the vicinity, so it's pretty well hidden. I didn't even bother to screenshot the item here, if any, so you can view it as purely optional, however. You could go the whole game unaware that this is even here and not miss anything.

There are a lot of little hidden areas in this game, huh. And I reckon I missed all of them in my playthrough.



This Mr. Prog, rather depressingly, practices every day in anticipation of the broken alarm being fixed.

A Mr Prog with a broken alarm? I think I've seen that recently.



Yeah, seems to happen a lot, I guess.



WELCOME TO FUCKING YOKA! HOPE YOU LIKE-Sorry.



It seems DeviantArt users are around in MMBN land.

...Morbid curiosity tingling. Let's go look up "megaman battle network" on yon pit of depravity, shall we?

NO DON'T DO IT AAAAAA

*Half a minute later.* Well, not even 10 seconds of scrolling down the results, and I mildly regretted it. I'm largely desensitized to most of that kind of fetish-pumped filth, honestly. Since the MMBN4 LP demonstrated that my suffering amuses others, I'll relate an anecdote.

So, I take characters I write seriously, tabletop, short story, or whatever. I had commissioned a picture of a recurring favorite from a friend-of-a-friend on DeviantArt. She assured me that this artist was skilled, and a look at her gallery confirmed as much. The artist in question did streams of themselves drawing their pictures, and I decided to be present during the drawing's production so as to offer opinions and artistic directions. The end result picture is indeed one of my favorites...though it came at the cost of listening to 5 hours of fursuit discussion, such as how cute the giant bear costume one of the artist's fans/friends/followers was saving up for. I'm not sure if I should be proud or disturbed by the fact I just offered snarky jokes the whole time and kept an unbothered poker face.

Haha. There's this one artist on DeviantArt who decided my long-running webcomic was copied from theirs. Despite mine starting earlier and being a different genre. And then they got really upset because I was selling commissions to fundraise for a friend who was trying to get out of an abusive household, because that might be money that was otherwise spent buying commissions from them. Long story short, you got lucky getting a good commission from DeviantArt, so very nice! It is also very nice to avoid DeviantArt for a bunch of reasons, jesus christ.



Pictured: a bunch of reasons. With the revolting fetish art that is a staple of DeviantArt carefully removed.




This sight gag brought to you by MMBN3.

Both of them are carefully avoiding looking at the ""art"", which has led to their predicament.



Anyway, all that taken care of, the regrouping commences outside the lion cage.

Please ignore the way it looks like the lion could easily just step over the gap and fence and right out of its enclosure. That is definitely a trick of perspective.



Mayl quickly brings up the fact of how hostile and angry all the animals are. You can guess where this is going.



NetFrica was mentioned offhand in MMBN2 as well, and you actually get to see it in MMBN4.

Unless you're lucky



Everyone jumps as the lion roars, however. Contrary to what The Lion King or other pop culture might have you think, male lions are kind of the slackasses of the jungle cats. The females are the ones who do the work.

Aww! They animated the sprite properly and everything!



Yai, Lan, BFFs, etc., song and tapdance.

It's probably hilarious to get called a child by somebody younger than you and half your height.



This being Battle Network, by the time Lan, resident Dumbass McEatsalot shonen protagonist, notices something is wrong, you can bet that it's well past the point of anyone else being able to do something about it.

He notices it while facing the other direction. Skills!



And so naturally...



Chisao is apparently light enough for the resident vulture to carry off. Sadly, the little brat isn't going to be clawed to death and then regurgitated into the open mouths of peeping birdlings. Come to think of it, I think the only named human character who ever actually explicitly dies in Battle Network is Arashi from MMBN2.

Chisao is apparently the raddest character. Being carried around by vultures like it ain't no thang.



Along comes Dex, out of breath from chasing the vulture. Or was it a condor? Bah whatever, not like the game is going to treat them as different.

Alls I know is, that bird is huge. And since it has nothing to do with computers (whoa! for a change) I guess that's all I have to know.



Attempting to pursue Chisao, it turns out that the lions have somehow leaped over the fence and (if you look closely) gap of the enclosure. Jurassic Park this ain't, but hey, zoo breakout, I think that happens in every video game with a zoo ever. Sadly, this is not Zoo Tycoon, so no feeding pedestrians to crocodile pits while extorting them for the honor of using the bathrooms.

Welp, since we're the zoo visitors in this instance, it's probably for the best this game is nothing like Zoo Tycoon. Also, lions! Oh my!



And so we regain control of Lan, though the ways around you can take are boxed in by animals.

Lan could take on a lion, if he had to. I mean he did take on a rampaging robot bear last game*.

_{*sssh. that's how I prefer to remember it}



Except the useless-ass panda. I think I ranted in the original LP that panda conservation efforts are pretty emblematic of everything we're doing wrong with conservation efforts. I stand by that still, but will relent from my rambling tendencies and spare readers having to scroll past my nonsense again.





The main gate is barred, so we'll have to find another route. Which is on the same screen, even, and about 3 seconds to the northwest from Lan's current position.

To be fair the zoo isn't exactly huge to begin with.



Yeah, guess where this goes.



Here's why the game, as usual, brought player attention to something: because you'll be using it shortly.

Welcome to MegaMan Battle Network!! Enjoy your stay!!



Now, rampaging animals have invaded the Ura Inn, and as any pet owner can attest, there's nothing an animal enjoys more than shitting on everything you don't want it to.

Gunther's alright, he doesn't got when he's in the house. He's a good chicken.



...just giving you the Gunther-update



The venerable innkeeper lady from earlier valiantly distracts a python, however, allowing Lan to pass.

Distracts? She could totally take it on. Then again, she is set up right next to the zoo, she'd possibly prepared for exactly this occurence.



Hey, kid, you'd be surprised. Flamingoes cause an estimated 300 deaths per year, innocent people felled in droves by their ravenous, vicious brutali-okay yeah who gives a damn about a berserk flamingo.



I wouldn't mess with a berserk flamingo.



I swear, I should devise some sort of emoticon to denote the blink animation working its magic. From dull surprise, sarcasm, flirting, smug looks, or just complete apathy, we can always rely on it to make a scene funnier by casting the characters in a different light.

_{And make commentary really easy.}

It's like easy mode for screenshot LPs!



Chisao, now somehow unconscious, has been taken up to the electrical pylon from earlier. I don't think the thing actually has electricity running through it since it's disconnected and all, but hey, falling however high that thing is would probably make Chisao go splat.

Naw, man. He's just chilling. They're bros, him and the bird.



Lan, to his credit, does attempt to get closer, but the bird swoops down to prevent any closer intrusion.



Oh, okay, condor, not vulture. This is what happens when I write an update and take breaks over the course of a few days.

It does look an awful lot like a vulture though*

_{*has never actually seen a vulture}



MegaMan alerts the others to the situation, and the gang shows up.



Chisao promptly wakes up, and is understandably terrified. With his eyes closed.

Good thing he's very still when startled, like all small children.



Annnd naturally the zookeeper is responsible for all this, as a frantic employee relates.

??



She explains that the animals all have health observation chips.



And in typical MMBN fashion, something electronic is doing something it should have no capacity to ever do. This easily could have been written as "the chips are being overloaded and are causing the animals pain to drive them berserk", but no. Straight to the tinfoil hat-grade conspiracy theorist MIND CONTROL HEALTH CHIPS it goes.

A-HA! I KNEW IT WAS COMPUTERS it is always computers




"Hey boss, why are all the animals being rounded up and given surgical implants?" "You're imagining things."

Why would they not be OK with microchips being implanted into the animals, though? I mean all my animals are microchipp- OH NO ZOOKEEPER DON'T SEND MY ANIMALS BERSERK



She does explain that we can get into the ZooComp from the info panel next to the panda cage, however. Welp, dungeon 2, here we come.



Thankfully, the front gate of the zoo got unlocked, so you don't need to backtrack all the way back through Yoka and the inn again.

Watch out for that berserk panda!!



The zoo network, as has been mentioned in the thread, is a largely entertaining romp. The standard "find thing, bring it to the thematic gate, progress" mold is adhered to, but you'll soon see what this place's spin on the formula is.

It has an awesome background. Just putting that out there.



It's a Cat Mr. Prog!



_{just picture me chasing this cat around the living room with my mr prog, yelling 'let me take a picture of youuuuu' as my housemate looks on in bemusement}



Followed by a mouse virus! We may not get Tom and Jerry antics here, but this whole dungeon is themed on the animal kingdom. More specifically, the food chain. Usually.

Uh, sorry. I don't have a mouse or a Met toy. Regrets, I have many.



And so, the animal-related viruses require you to bring the appropriate program to get rid of it from the path forward.



I stipulated that things are usually based on the food chain, but expect things to get weirder as we go along.

"Weirder as we go along" is like the motto of these games.



For one thing, everything explodes. And I mean everything. You'll see how goofy this gets.

Nature truly is beautiful.



Alright, what preys on frogs? Australians?

Nooo! It's just a coincidence that we have so many endangered frog species, honest.



A snake will suffice.

Also a coincidence we have so many highly poisonous snakes.



The next area is when things start getting mixed up. This rabbit virus here is lonely! So what if we bring it a friend?



It detonates, of course! Had this been a game with visual direction from other sources, you'd half expect the virus to explode in a fountain of hearts and confetti.



I am getting a lot of mileage out of this stuffed toy



There's also a few decent goodies tucked away here. The paths are very sparse, mostly just a central pathway with a few branching offshoots, and you'll be poking around anyway for the correct programs anyway.

Geez I'm excited for customisation shenanigans.



This gorilla virus is hungry.



I advise MissEchelon to avert her eyes and scroll past this one.

what?



OFFER SACRIFICE TO THE METTAUR. SATE HIS UNDYING HUNGER FOR MR. PROG CYBERFLESH.

OH NOO MR BANANAPROGGGGG



A single banana did this. Apparently he was the Mr. Creosote of viruses.

Mr Progs are just good at their jobs ;_;



Another CopyDamage * is tucked away here, and much like the other one at the beginning of the game, it'll be a handy chip in the postgame.



Sea lion virus! MegaMan states he looks bored.

How did Capcom even come up with this gimmick. I mean seriously, I'm starting to question this now that I've run out of animals to photograph.



Either the program is a ball itself, or maybe it's a game of Breakout/Arkanoid/Ballion an employee was storing on the system.

If a Mr Prog tells you he's ball-like, he's ball-like, dangit.



You know how some modern games include features to remind the player to go do something else after a few hours of play? This is Capcom's take on the idea, a cautionary tale.

Is that why this update was delayed? That's reasonable. ALWAYS TAKE BREAKS or explode, people.



Clam virus, meet otter program.



I like to think that this system, which is inside an educational terminal and all, teaches children that animals are all made of explosives that can and will detonate at the slightest provocation.

"Don't fuck with animals" is a cornerstone of the Australian education system, so I can get behind that.



Area 3 of the dungeon opens up with a tree! Oddly enough, we'll be seeing actual tree-virus field obstacles later in the game, about, eh, 3 scenarios from now I think. We'll have a different method of eliminating them by then.

It's huge!! Look at him! Aww, Met, he tries so hard.



Incidentally, in this area, the only virus of note is the Beetle. It's basically identical to the BeeTanks of previous games, but with a movement pattern that tries to take it to the opposite end of the field from MegaMan.

The design isn't as cool as BeeTanks, but since there are Spikeys here too, I'll allow it.



Anyway, Leave it to Beaver.



You'll notice my HP has dropped into the red, that's partly because of the combination of grass panels and Spikeys. But mostly my usual complete lack of caring about dodging unless I'm near death, combined with liberal use of the fast forward button.

The pro way to play the game: lazefully. Speaking of which, oh hey pandas.



Anyway, now we start getting combinations of viruses. This is just as basic as bringing two programs, and the order doesn't matter.

Good thing the order doesn't matter. Geez, that part in MMBN5 where you had to bring Mr Progs in the correct order got kind of painful.



Also of note, the SneakRun program! I've debated trying to speedrun this game in the future, and SneakRun is pretty integral to the idea. SneakRun basically turns off random encounters if MegaMan's capabilities are high enough for the local area. Naturally, being able to shut the random encounters up would save a lot of time in a speedrun. That said, I don't know what actually gets tracked to determine if MegaMan is strong enough for SneakRun to work.

Additionally, you can bug SneakRun on the NaviCust to crank the random encounter rate up, which is actually handy for chip or BugFrag farming if you need it.

Neat! I didn't know that about bugging SneakRun. But having less random encounters in these games is cool because a lot of the dungeon themes are actually quite long and quite good, but you'd never hear them when they get interrupted by random battles all the time.




The first panda eats until it explodes, followed by the second one erupting in a self-destructive blast of fun.

Another cautionary tale.



I don't even need to tell you how this one goes.

Aww, I think Mega's getting a bit tired of this gimmick now too.



And here's where things get weird. Our progress is stymied by a jar.



I checked my kitchen cupboard, none of my jars looked unsatisfied.

But like, how do you know, man.



You have to wonder what Japanese colleges' logic classes look like. "Now, we've introduced the standard logical fallacies, but glorious Nippon has introduced a controversial new one. It can be described with this simple formula:

R = I x (S/L)^C

Or, expanded:

Relevance = Incongruity x (Subject/Location)^ Coolness

Something is more likely to be effective if it makes no sense to be in a given situation, especially if the subject matter and location are already nonsensical. And the more cool something is, the more better. Study hard!"

People joke about Japan making robots that will inevitably overtake humanity, but given their role models for learning, I can't help but think Tsukainetto's creations will be under the impression that the more impractical solution something is, the more effective it will be. Alternatively, do Japanese people look at western media and react with total confusion? Like, "Wait, this machine isn't bipedal, can be mass-produced, and doesn't feature an angsty, improbably young teenager at the controls. Does that actually work!?" Or is it more mundane, like "Oh, western pornography doesn't feature 7th graders, that's boring."



Witty social commentary, that's what everyone wants to read about in a Let's Play. Shall I perhaps debase myself with political references? Remember, aspiring LPers, a strong dose of self-loathing is instrumental to your future hobby.

Political references?! Dude I got you covered. Our federal election's next month so I am full of LP-irrelevant commentary. Abbott wears budgie-smugglers! Kevin07!! ah... wait, hang on



Annnd right into area 4, the last of the dungeon, we hit a brick wall.



What indeed, MegaMan.



Much faffing around and struggling later, I realized the problem. Yes, that's a Mr. Prog flying into the air, that's what happens when you bring the wrong program to a virus.

Flying Mr Prog? So majestic...



Namely, the game isn't loading the correct program to solve this situation. What you're supposed to do here is go past a parrot virus (defeated via tongue-twister program) and that'll lead you to a cul-de-sac with, among other nut programs, I think a coconut program that the virus explodes from trying to open. Only, it's not appearing. The other programs, all of which were tested desperately, show up and fail as normal.

Can I go a single Battle Network LP without running into copy protection? I wasn't even dicking with cheat codes this time! This may require me playing back up to this point in the game on another file, folks. I've tried restarting the game, jacking out and back in, etc., this situation is impassible.

Thanks to, coincidentally, a code written by MegaRock.EXE (the guy who co-wrote the MMBN6 patch I played), however, I can attempt to walk through walls (or rather, teleport out of bounds). However, I have a sneaking suspicion that even if I used that code, I'd just run into more problems like this later, and inevitably wind up 7 hours into the game stuck with a broken event flag that renders progression fully impossible.

Long story short, technical difficulties, please wait!

Oh dang! Best of luck getting a net big enough to catch them Progs, man.